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"Inferiority complex fuels desire to be rescued"

March 6th, 2014

Naaz Fahmida

Portraying themselves as the weaker sex is a common role for women, writes  Naaz Fahmida, 27, a Commonwealth Correspondent from Bangladesh, as she looks at the consequences of that concept.  

In my interactions with women recently I have noticed a phenomenon which is a little more universal. It refers to the general psyche of womanhood and the part of us that wants to be rescued. 

Yes, this phrase does remind me of an episode from the show Sex and the City, which probably stands out as a prolific example of a program that struts all the deepest and darkest of female vulnerabilities on a plate. The only statement that it does make is that of fashion – I would have to give them credit for that! 

We are physically disadvantaged; the doubts that cloud our mind range from our monthly cramps in the abdominal region to being at the disadvantaged end of having to bear the consequences of a sexual experience gone wrong, to our child-bearing agonies – but then again where is the fun being a hero who does not rise against all odds and has not tasted the bitter sense of suffering. Where is the sense of achievement in a battle that is not often punctuated with small defeats and disappointments? 

At least being the ‘weaker’ sex has clearly defined our goals for generations! Coming back to the incessant need for being rescued, I cannot deny this myself, that there is an embodied feeling of glee in being manned by a man, which often become the initial reason for attraction between men and women.  That feeling of romanticism should perhaps be strictly held within the proximities of the bedroom. But when it comes to the more serious, decision-making aspect of life, doubts that you are incapable of surviving or upholding a set of belief without it being endorsed by your male counterpart is a complete loss of individuality.

So very often I see women in interactions falling completely silent when their male counterparts speak up and what is worse, often echoing their voices because somewhere deep down they actually consider them to be superior. 

This attitude tends to surpass age, qualification or individual accomplishments in life. It could be a couple where both practice medicine, went to the same college, had similar grades – but the woman still feels the need to consult her partner before voicing out an opinion. 

Just because you decide to spend your life with a person does not justify leaving behind the old values, beliefs, orientations and opinions that make you who you are. Yet from what I have seen, when a woman decides to spend her life with the man of her dreams, she invariably tends to leave behind a lot more than just her maiden name.

photo credit: Mobelgrad via photopin cc

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About me: I am an Accounting graduate and HR specialist, currently a PR and Communications person by the day. Donning my superman outfit, I invade the writing world once the clock strikes midnight!

I am Bangladeshi first, Australian second, have a fair dinkum accent and accentuated Bangali-ana, a Muslim name and inheritance. I’m a firm follower of Rama and Dharma, which makes me weak in the knees for Buddha, and I love Christmas. For everything else – you must must follow the white rabbit!”

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Opinions expressed in this article are those of the author and do not necessarily represent the views of the Commonwealth Youth Programme. Articles are published in a spirit of dialogue, respect and understanding. If you disagree, why not submit a response?

To learn more about becoming a Commonwealth Correspondent please visit:
http://www.yourcommonwealth.org/submit-articles/commonwealthcorrespondents/

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Naaz Fahmida

Portraying themselves as the weaker sex is a common role for women, writes  Naaz Fahmida, 27, a Commonwealth Correspondent from Bangladesh, as she looks at the consequences of that concept.  

In my interactions with women recently I have noticed a phenomenon which is a little more universal. It refers to the general psyche of womanhood and the part of us that wants to be rescued. 

Yes, this phrase does remind me of an episode from the show Sex and the City, which probably stands out as a prolific example of a program that struts all the deepest and darkest of female vulnerabilities on a plate. The only statement that it does make is that of fashion – I would have to give them credit for that! 

We are physically disadvantaged; the doubts that cloud our mind range from our monthly cramps in the abdominal region to being at the disadvantaged end of having to bear the consequences of a sexual experience gone wrong, to our child-bearing agonies – but then again where is the fun being a hero who does not rise against all odds and has not tasted the bitter sense of suffering. Where is the sense of achievement in a battle that is not often punctuated with small defeats and disappointments? 

At least being the ‘weaker’ sex has clearly defined our goals for generations! Coming back to the incessant need for being rescued, I cannot deny this myself, that there is an embodied feeling of glee in being manned by a man, which often become the initial reason for attraction between men and women.  That feeling of romanticism should perhaps be strictly held within the proximities of the bedroom. But when it comes to the more serious, decision-making aspect of life, doubts that you are incapable of surviving or upholding a set of belief without it being endorsed by your male counterpart is a complete loss of individuality.

So very often I see women in interactions falling completely silent when their male counterparts speak up and what is worse, often echoing their voices because somewhere deep down they actually consider them to be superior. 

This attitude tends to surpass age, qualification or individual accomplishments in life. It could be a couple where both practice medicine, went to the same college, had similar grades – but the woman still feels the need to consult her partner before voicing out an opinion. 

Just because you decide to spend your life with a person does not justify leaving behind the old values, beliefs, orientations and opinions that make you who you are. Yet from what I have seen, when a woman decides to spend her life with the man of her dreams, she invariably tends to leave behind a lot more than just her maiden name.

photo credit: Mobelgrad via photopin cc

…………………………………………………………………………………………………

About me: I am an Accounting graduate and HR specialist, currently a PR and Communications person by the day. Donning my superman outfit, I invade the writing world once the clock strikes midnight!

I am Bangladeshi first, Australian second, have a fair dinkum accent and accentuated Bangali-ana, a Muslim name and inheritance. I’m a firm follower of Rama and Dharma, which makes me weak in the knees for Buddha, and I love Christmas. For everything else – you must must follow the white rabbit!”

…………………………………………………………………………………………………
Opinions expressed in this article are those of the author and do not necessarily represent the views of the Commonwealth Youth Programme. Articles are published in a spirit of dialogue, respect and understanding. If you disagree, why not submit a response?

To learn more about becoming a Commonwealth Correspondent please visit:
http://www.yourcommonwealth.org/submit-articles/commonwealthcorrespondents/

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