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“It’s a question of love – what is it?”
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“It’s a question of love – what is it?”

Eric AgyemangEric Ageymang, 23, a Correspondent from Accra in Ghana, uses a tale of student romance to raise philosophical questions about the nature and allure of love.

So patiently, I waited for my turn to write my name and ID number for the lecture.

Standing in front of such a small but philosophically inquisitive class was not funny at all. How they look at you alone can give you what I call “pressure”.

Thank God! I was the next in line to a beautiful lady, I must admit.

“Having her as a friend would not be bad at all,” was my inner wish.

To strike a conversation, I pretended not having a pen. “Can I use your pen?”, I asked, trying to sound as diplomatic as possible. She hands it over to me.

Seconds afterwards, my mind started racing with options on where, how and when to get the pen back to her when I realized she had gone to sit. Casting my eyes across the academic crowd, I could not locate her.

I believe we don’t get a second chance to make a first impresssion. “What first impression am I trying to create for myself, the guy who absconded with my pen!” I soliloquised.

As I sat, I felt an unfamiliar tap on my shoulder. Ooh, there she was, sitting just behind me. With an affectionate smile, I handed back the pen to her.

Our second meeting (in the library) registered an interesting scene as she got surprised with the mention of her name, which was never asked but known. I could not help but join her to study, after which we had some academic discussion. The friendship I imagined had from then started loading….

We entered the cafeteria after a philosophy lecture one hot afternoon. As new friends trying to know each other better, we spent most of our time together, unintentionally making our presence felt almost everywhere on campus.

As the days went by, our friendship grew stronger not only in our minds but also in the public’s view as we were enjoined by the court of public opinion. Friends started asking her whereabouts when I was seen alone, and vice versa.

Soon, constructions of love had been made in the minds of colleagues about us.

Appearances indeed can be deceptive, and in this case it was humongously deceptive as we ourselves realized we were doing virtually everything together as campus lovers do, but were just friends.

With time, my mind began to ponder and started thinking through the lovers tag our colleagues had given us.

Is it really true that we look good together, isn’t it possible to date her? Amazing how we allow peoples’ perception to get hold of us.

I realized time was going to be the ultimate decider in telling the fact or fiction of our relationship, as I became convinced to follow my heart, which seemed to have been invaded by the chorus of the public.

But as said William Shakespeare in Twelfth Night, “If music be the food of love, play on”. This philosophical, yet poetically crafted assertion I have come to not only entertain but accept, as one needs no survey to find that love is an irresistible desire to be desired irresistibly by that special person. Everyone seems to admit that love is wonderful and necessary, yet we seem not to agree on just what it is. The beginning of my wonder!

Love is a canvass furnished by nature and embroidered by imagination, I have come to believe. It is the only journey started with high-pinned hopes and expectations, yet it fails like nobody’s business. I have spent days and years trying to reconcile this seemingly irreconcilable fact of the otherwise anticipated failures of such enthusiastic and promisingly hopeful journeys of love.

The million dollar question I have been trying to answer is “what is the nature of love?” – a simple question but with many underlying variables.

I believe if love is to mean anything, it must observe the principle of the “right reason”. That is, loving for the right reason. But there arrives my dilemma! Should I go for what society sees as good for me by sacrificing my intention to its dictates and stereotypes – or pursue what I know I want?

This dilemma has found and will continue to find many.

Parents selecting or forcing spouses on their daughters and sons, sacrificing personal happiness for a rich marriage, marrying out of pity, sympathy or as repayment of a favour, remain questions that have been asked not once but ad nauseam.

I have no answers to such questions, but becoming conscious of them I believe will help in loving for the right reason.

NB:The short story above is entirely fictitious.It bears no semblance or resemblance of any situation or event.

Photo credit: http://mrg.bz/qNwNya

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About me: I am a self-motivated young man who is eager to set new standards in every area I find myself. This is flamed by my thirst for self- and institutional achievement.

I am a level 300 political science and philosophy student of the University of Ghana. I believe in using writing as a tool to change the world. I dream of becoming a lawyer to fight for the rights and interests of the vulnerable.

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Opinions expressed in this article are those of the author and do not necessarily represent the views of the Commonwealth Youth Programme. Articles are published in a spirit of dialogue, respect and understanding. If you disagree, why not submit a response.
To learn more about becoming a Commonwealth Correspondent please visit: http://www.yourcommonwealth.org/submit-articles/commonwealthcorrespondents/…………………………………………………………………………………………………………………

 

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